Day 11—Oh god, please not the electricity!

Notice the glass shards embedded in the wall.

This was a day that really doesn’t count, because I spent most of it recovering from the trauma of yesterday’s STARING and bumpy roads, doing laundry, and writing about Days 8 and 9.  So, it was like I wasn’t even here in the present, but like I time warped and was living in the past.  Also, I was reading a really entertaining book, which was totally addictive and funny. 

Then I thought I had a fever, and was convinced that I was dying of either Malaria or Dengue Fever. 

So….I had to lay in an air conditioned bedroom watching the one English speaking channel we get—Food Network—which is pretty much what I do at home anyway. (Well except for the dying part.)

And then we had ANOTHER storm, and the electricity went out, and I thought, “NOOOO, anything but the electricity…I WILL SUFFOCATE! We are in a steamy JUNGLE…this can’t be happening! Please, I can live without water (I bargained) just DON’T TAKE THE AIR CONDITIONING AWAY!” 

Then 3 minutes later the power was back on. 

 I guess I overreacted. 

 Just a bit.

So, I started thinking about what I miss about home, and here is the list I came up with:

What I Miss About Home

(Well…of course Myles tops the list—even if doesn’t read my blog)

1.  Being invisible 
2. People speaking English (because then, I know what the hell is going on)
3. Cheap, abundant Veggies…We are so spoiled in the U.S. (well, except for Hawaii, which I would have the same complaint about).
4. Hundreds of channels of English speaking T.V. (even if you don’t watch them it’s a comfort to know that they are there)
5. SMOOTH ROADS!
6. Our cats and dog (not necessarily in that order)
7. Quiet evenings that don’t involve a loud bass thumping on a Sunday evening (unless you are in Richmond or Oakland…but really, you shouldn't be there at night!)
8. Stoplights and lines on the roads.
9.  ROAD SIGNS
10. Public access to the beach that doesn't involve solving the riddle of the Sphinx (Or buying beach front property)
11. A highway that doesn't feel like you are one honk away from “death by a Mac Truck”
12. Really good, artisanal  cheeses  (spell check suggests bipartisan for artisanal, but I disagree, I think artisanal cheeses are very factional...oh and avoid New Zealand cheddar at all costs)
13. Crackers that don’t cost $3.99 a box (and 20 minutes of my life)
14. Spicy foods (in general)
15. Szechuan Chinese Food (in particular)
16. Good wines
17. French roast coffee
18. Moderate weather (AKA not needing air conditioning)
19. Non-feral animals (including horses!)
20. Houses without barbed-wire and broken glass on the fence
21. Consistent hot water
22. Consistent electricity (spoiler alert! wait ‘till day 13 when the power actually does go out for 3 HOURS!)
23. Not being sweaty, except when you work out (and by work out, I mean vacuum)
24. Clean beaches
25. Cops that actually recognize that there are people in their town that may speak another language (because it has a HUGE EXPAT COMMUNITY!) 

Oh, by the way, I probably don’t have malaria or dengue fever.  (I don’t understand why these diseases aren't capitalized.  Shouldn't something that can kill you be in like, all capitals with an exclamation point?)

MALARIA! DENGUE FEVER!  There.  That gives them the kind of fearful respect they deserve.